I’ll be the first to admit that I’m not the savviest when it comes to traveling. I’ve booked flights for the completely wrong month, I’m consistently swindled by beggars and I’ve been known to make any urban side street my own private restroom. I’m embarking on a year of travel in 12 cities around the world… there are bound to be some hiccups.
And what better way to celebrate my misfortune then by getting rich at my expense? Below you’ll find a list of everything and anything you can gamble on from finding a wife to drug trafficking. Don’t see something on the big board? Let’s hear it and I’ll add it to the list. Odds and lines will be updated throughout the year (I’ve already missed a flight, so we’ll have to tweak that) and payouts will be delivered through my money guy “Big Joe” on Venmo.
If I could gamble on myself, I would put every cent I own on the “Getting Swindled” over. Let’s ride.
Country-specific odds
Finding a wife (country of origin)
- American – 4/1
- Colombian – 7/2
- Croatian – 10/1
- Czech – 150/1
- Argentinian – 50/1
- Mexican – 30/1
- Serbian – 9/1
- Peruvian – off the board, not enough info
- Bulgarian – 200/1
- Other – 500/1
Kidnapped (on-location)
- America – off the board
- Colombia – even money
- Croatia – 100/1
- Czech Republic – 75/1
- Argentina – 30/1
- Mexico – 3/1
- Serbia – 6/1
- Peru – 50/1
- Bulgaria – 9/1
- Other – 100/1
Over / Under
- Swindled by homeless – O/U 10 (not a matter of “if,” but a matter of how many times)
- Food poisoning – O/U 4
- Chirped by Boston friends for social media content – O/U 500
- Can’t find his own apartment – O/U 50
- Instagram followers by year-end – O/U 10,000
- Highest bar tab – O/U $300
- Bar tabs over $100 – O/U 15
- Number of consecutive days without showering – O/U 6
- Wallets stolen – O/U 3
- Cheeky kiss with local – O/U 7
- Missed flights – O/U 4 (already got one in the books)
- # of visitors who actually come visit – O/U 6
Odds
- Contracts obscure illness – 12/1
- Signs contract with foreign soccer team – 1000/1 (a kid can dream, right?)
- Gets involved with Bulgarian mob – 750/1
- Body used for drug trafficking – 1000/1
- Learns another language – HA!
- Forced to shave head because of terrible haircut – 20/1
- Hospital-inducing sunburn – 50/1
- Never returns to U.S. – 500/1